I'm sorry Garth!! T_T

And yet again, I forgot to post last night. Really busy playing ME2

I apologize for having nothing yesterday. This has been a rough week. To make up for the lack of a post and having nothing to write today either, I give you:

The Code Monkey's Drinking Song
--------------------------------
Oooh, we like to code and we link to drink
Don't give a damn what anyone thinks
Play video games
Aint seen no dames
We'll write you sql and we'll writ you lisp,
Just let me take another sip
Java Java Java
Oy! Oy! Oy!

It's short I know, but as with any drinking song, it would be better if I were drinking when I wrote it. Perhaps I will post a revised version later. In the meantime, it is soon time for me to play Mass Effect 2 again. Good night Internet.

A wild Delangey appears!

Sorry everyone, forgot to post this before leaving yesterday.

Really slow day. Boredom has overcome almost every aspect of my life. Welcome to Groundhog day! Enjoy them:

Frank: "Ever since you guys started working here my computer's been a lot slower. And it's just the way things work here, but it's your fault."
Phil: "No. You're right, it is our fault. We's stealin' all your megahertz."

new Timestamp(Calendar.getInstance().getTime().getTime()) ... Java's date/time functions aren't complicated at ALL - Thanks Phil

I noticed something about that whole Longcat is Long, thing...If you just change some of the spacing and meaning around...you can get: Long cat = new Long();...I'm down wit OOP - Thanks again Phil

FOUL! Aggressive type-checking! Penalty: 2 minutes! - Wow...just crankin' 'em out today 'at 'e is
----------
Well, you see..Maxi Pad.
Max(iPad).
iPad.
Apple: A computer for your bleeding vagina.
----------
Great success! Well done Phil


My inner nerd must be dying. None of todays gems are from me.

So a sensitive situation has arisen. This involves the protection of someone who is not able to defend themself. Fight for what you believe, especially if you do not believe very much. Good night Internet.

whatwhatwhat?

As many of you know, not all of these gems come directly from me. So more and more frequently you will see conversations either for context or because it's not a single one-liner. Enjoy them:

Phil: Why do our online tools redirect to service down messages in the most frustrating and useless way?
Me: because you were Hitler in a past life
Phil: And now I can't grow a mustache. Irony!

Phil: I'm hacking some code I abandoned from the projects.
Me: prom night dumpster code?
Phil: I REGRET NOTHING!

Davey: How come amazon.com always thinks i'm in the UK when I go there from work?
Me: because you traded the family hypnotoad for a bag of magic beans
Davey: but the gray noise told me to!
Me: Chuck Norris is displeased with you
Davey: but does Garth still love me?
Me: Fear not, Garth loves all his children

Mass Effect 2 today! Time for me to play. Good night Internet.

I am become script - The shatterer of IDEs

Boredom has overcome every aspect of life. Enjoy it:

Documentation and You: a Work Sucks Story

------------------------------------------------------
This one's for you buddy!
------------------------------------------------------

I hopped in the code with N++
with a dream and my compiler
welcome to the app for JIT debug, (woah)
am I gonna break it?

Jumped in the app,
Here I am for the first time
Look to the root and I see the sys admin
This is all so crazy
All the code seems so lazy

My browser's churnin and I'm seein' lotsa bug fix
Too much pressure and I'm nervous,
That's when the cubicle turned to a server farm
and an uplink light was on
and the uplink light was on
and the uplink light was on

CHORUS:
So I put my hands up
They’re running my script,
And the lisp apps fly away
Noddin’ my head like yeah
Moving my code like yeah,
And I got my hands up,
They’re runnin my script
I know I'm gonna be ok
Yeah, It's a party in the server room
Yeah, It's a party in the server room

Get to the cube with my lunch in hand
Everybody's lookin at me now
Like “whos that chick, thats eatin' soy?
She gotta be a warabakk"

So bad when my code crashes on me
Its definitely not a sandbox party
Cause’ my code just wiped the bin dir
I guess I shoulda caught the error

My browser's churnin and I'm seein' lotsa bug fix
Too much pressure and I'm nervous
That's when JMI dropped my packet set
and a prod code freeze was on
and the prod code freeze was on
and the prod code freeze was on

CHORUS:
So I put my hands up
They’re running my script,
And the lisp apps fly away
Noddin’ my head like yeah
Moving my code like yeah,
And I got my hands up,
They’re runnin my script
I know I'm gonna be ok
Yeah, It's a party in the server room
Yeah, It's a party in the server room

Feel like forkin' up a proc (up a proc)
SU root to run again (to run againt)
Something stops me everytime (everytime)
The server runs my script and I feel alright!

CHORUS:
So I put my hands up
They’re running my script,
And the lisp apps fly away
Noddin’ my head like yeah
Moving my code like yeah,
And I got my hands up,
They’re runnin my script
I know I'm gonna be ok
Yeah, It's a party in the server room
Yeah, It's a party in the server room


So I put my hands up
They’re running my script,
And the lisp apps fly away
Noddin’ my head like yeah
Moving my code like yeah,
And I got my hands up,
They’re runnin my script
I know I'm gonna be ok
Yeah, It's a party in the server room
Yeah, It's a party in the server room (Party in the server room!)
------------------------------------------------------


This isn't the glamorous life of enterprise programming I was promised

Ok, let's try to salvage what little is left of my motivation. Good night Internet.

Weekend is a term referring to two traditionally non-working days in a seven-day week.

Some of you may remember the classic Java cannot cast from Apple to Apple from earlier. Well, apparently C++ can be a whiny little kid like that too.

MP1_engine_o_mat.cpp:83: error: invalid conversion from `char' to `char'

Yes, it's only one snippet, but this is the weekend. Take what you can get.
Oh yeah. Hi, guys. Good to meet y'all.

Thank Garth It's Friday

Long week. Finally over. Weekend is welcome. Enjoy them:

public int haiku(){
int b = c + 2;
return b % c;
}

Davey: and the garth commanded, "let there be light"?
Phil: Garth would command Light light = new Sun("yellow"); light.run();

you know the big bang theory? well it's become a law...with some modifications
[garth@universe /]$ !

If a build fails and no service is running to acknowledge it, does it still send a notification?

Me: If one were to take the fourier transform of the women in this establishment, they could derive the likelihood that I will be departing alone...1
Phil: That's just trying too hard
-Yes, yes it is Phil, and the best part is there aren't enough variables listed to even do that.

Phil: Oh god. This is the person outsourcing demotivators are made about. BUT THEY'RE NOT AN OUTSOURCE.

Time for me to go enjoy this glorious weekend. Good night Internet.

i laugh at your suffering!

Last night's post

Not quite as rough a day as yesterday. BOO WORK hooray documentation? bleh. Enjoy them:

I've had it with these monkey fighting snakes on this Monday to Friday plane

We are using a patchwork nuclear missile to kill a gnat.

Garth kills Dumbledore

Pickup lines:
How are you with differential equations?
I could teach you about Heisenberg's Uncertainty principle...
I'm looking for Schrödinger's cat, mind helping me find it?

Me: I thought you processed in a queue not a stack
Phil: I guess the pointer jumped
Me: oh nooo

Phil: Do you know if IBM has any java based DB stack that can easily plug into websphere?
Me: LOL
Me: IBM...easy...websphere
Me: I laugh at your suffering

Ok I am off to try to make something of my evening. We shall see. Good night Internet.